Not the life I’d choose, but God’s life for me

Driving home from the wedding of childhood friend named Anna, I caught myself reminiscing. Anne (as she was lovingly dubbed) and I spent many days during high school and many summers watching movies and tv series. Anne lived the closest to me growing up, so we spent a good amount of time hanging out. One summer we watched nearly all of the episode for several seasons of Smallville. Cress came over for some of those episodes. Anne loved popcorn and the green apple and grape double bubble bubblegum bucket my Dad loved so much and always had on hand. All of my friends growing up will have special places in my heart, but Anne was the quirky, adorable and funny friend that was always there. There were many days we’d just say “oh Anne” to many things she said or did. Simply because she was herself and we loved her for it. Like having a life-size Rudolph bust window cling on the back car window for the majority of the year, her love of comics, and her love of glasses.

I love my life now, I love my friends (most of which are at different stages of life than I am which is strange and yet very rewarding), and I love the story God is writing for my husband and me.

But sometimes I can’t help but sit and think of how things use to be.

And then I look over at my handsome husband, driving the car back from a wedding where he only knew faces, scream-singing his favorite songs and I think of my life in NJ and realize I never would have picked this life, but that God constructed it so that we would be who He wants us to be and where and how. I never would have chose to live in NJ, far from friends and family and in a culture I sometimes don’t fit into. But I love my life in NJ. I love the friendships I’ve made and the experiences I’ve had.

Not the life I’d choose, but God’s life for me.


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